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then i dont know what is.

Let me relate to you my encounter with this one couple i met during the week.

The elderly wife was in a wheelchair. the stoke she suffered 10 years ago left her semi-paralysed; overnight she realised she had no use of her left hand and leg anymore. She also lost control of her bladder and bowel function, among other things.

She was wheeled into the examination room by her husband. He is and elderly gentleman, not frail but upon questioning, admitted to having a bad back.

When taking the history, I was strucked at how much the husband was able to give me a very detail answer, down to the description of his wife’s stool. It turned out that they live on their own and the husband has been the sole carer of his wife for all these years. He changes her diapers 4 to 6 times a day. He bathes her daily. He cooks for her. Not only that, he also mushes the food before she feed it to her. He transfer her from the bed into the chair in the morning, take her out for a breath of fresh air, transfer her to the sofa to watch tele in the evening; simply put, he becomes her pair of legs.

But the thing that strikes me the most as we went on with our conversation was how he, from time to time, glanced affectionately towards his wife before turning back to face me.

For the examination, I need the wife to be lying on the bed. He stopped me before I could go get the nurse to help. Then he walked round the bed to his wife, and as he said “Come on now, J..” the wife instinctively put her right hand around his neck whilst he scooped her up into his arms, make a small turn, and rest the wife gently on the bed. It all happen within a matter of seconds. I simple can’t believe it as the events unfold in front of my eyes. How could that be possible for a man in his seventies?? “let me change her diaper first, love, easier for you” And he expertly does that in a matter of seconds too.

I was touched when I saw Never been kissed, 10 things i hate about you, A walk to remember, etc, I have to admit. But then and there, I could feel a tear coming.

It was the best display of love I have seen, probably ever. For it is not simply a matter of a mutual attraction. It is about becoming responsible for and fulfilling your obligation towards your loved ones, whilst your affection to him/her never wavers.

Trust me to find a heart wrenching love story in a surgical ward eh?

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 19th, 2008 at 2:09 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.